the story
-
becoming a ghost of myself…
“You look really different. You lost a lot of weight. Are you okay?”She asked me in the cafeteria when I was going to put my tray away on the first day of sixth grade.The one full of barely touched food – but strategically and creatively packaged and organized to appear otherwise.I had noticed her staring Continue reading
-
the deal…
Before you read on, I must preface this particular writing.Because it is not a piece of my history I was sure would actually ever reach the light.It took me until I was 24 years old, during my very last attempt at treatment, to make it known to a therapist.26 until I addressed it directly with Continue reading
-
how did i get here…?
How did I get here?I could give you the abridged version – the one you would find in textbooks.Tell you about the anxiety, the desire to feel in control, the need to numb emotions, etc.But that doesn’t fully answer the question, does it?Because my mind could have landed on a slew of different coping mechanisms.So Continue reading
-
breaking all my rules…
“So, this is my new favorite chocolate. And Andrew Garfield loves it too.”“Haha. Is that how you heard about it?”“No, I learned that after the fact. I was just roaming the aisles of Harmons one day looking for something new. But it certainly helps my claim of being the best!”It was one of a few Continue reading
-
a love that keeps me holding on…
“Believe me when I say this, I was giving up but now you come and save me…”–I was holding it together (somewhat) until that lyric.The one that spoke my truth, as if SYML had once read the pages of my heart.They are the words I lived, the ones I made real.The privilege of a lifetime Continue reading
-
the love that makes you better…
I went to a concert last fall that was to be a proclamation of a healing heart, an ode to a chapter of a love story I once had the immense privilege to write.It turned into a night well felt – my eyes red and swollen long into the following day.I expected it to carry Continue reading
-
a glass wall is still a barrier…
“Outside! Outside now! Now!”The words the Pilates studio owner excitedly exclaimed at me as she came running inside.I immediately got up from my seat at the computer, mid text to a member trying to schedule a class, wondering what could possibly be this urgent.I was mentally preparing for the worst…or weirdest…As I got closer, she Continue reading
-
when i knew…
“I was 12 when I first realized I wanted to be a writer.”We were waiting on our food to arrive, catching up on the happenings of our lives since we last saw each other.Even the simplest of conversations captivating my thoughts into stillness.A mind undivided, unforced to pick a side.No tug of war to pull Continue reading
-
the avalanche released…
“Do you have any siblings?”He casually asked me back in February in between sips of his beer.Leaning back in the booth, settling in comfortably to our temporary location.We were at a bar in Park City waiting for our dinner reservation.He had just shared a story about his brother.The question was expected.–“I have an older brother.”I Continue reading
-
starting an avalanche…
“What are you writing about these days?”We had just received our food when he asked.Just having shared a good laugh over Gabe, the waiter, showing us where to find our “hidden” spoons.Which were so clearly visible on our plates.We thought up some scenarios as to what situations may have prompted that explanation.All the while he Continue reading
About Me
I am a woman on a mission to turn her pain into purpose using her passion for writing. This blog is the journey of my becoming, excerpts from the pages of my book of life – the good and bad and everything in between – written with the intent to heal, to guide, to inspire…
I write to document the tale of a heroine slaying every dragon that comes her way for she knows she is the only one who can save herself.
I write to tell the story of a woman brought back to life; a chronicle of rebirth to show the power of hope and redemption.
I write to give meaning to every yes spoken – whether in shouts or whispers, in fear or bravery.
I write to share with the world the story of what happens when one believes in the beauty of a better tomorrow. What happens when one refuses to settle for anything less than butterflies. What happens when a mere spark you defiantly declined to let go out ignites into an inferno.
I write to open the eyes of all those who feel like the victim in their own story to see that they are not helpless or damaged or weak. They are in control. They have everything within to become the victor.
I write to speak life into the grieving to allow words laced in truth and love to mend the wounds inhibiting the heart from moving forward.
I write for the invisible to feel seen. I write to lead us all on the journey to the happily ever after….it is waiting to be lived by each of us <3
Clandestine Confessions 